Fa la la la la... New new year.

I find when I am feeling quite lost, I struggle to write here. If I got no clue then why express that.. but maybe there is some point to doing so.
I find I am doing anything BUT work out where I am headed. Jump online, browse, look at gay dating websites (cause that is where quality lives), I even bought a PS3 so I can play computer games again. What?

New Years Resolution. Buy a camera, a good camera, and enroll in a community college course on how to use it. Then USE it. Make this a hobby. Give myself more meaning, as I love taking photos. You ever thought, so many people take good photos so why should I follow this as a passion? Yeah kinda dumb, but its how I think. So I am going to do it anyways. And also not see others as a threat but a support in those who love photography, and learn off them.

Christmas has gone and past. New Years Eve is next. Christmas was good this year, laid back brunch with everyone and watching the next generation for the first time open presents. It is actually really fun buying presents for them and then watching them open them! And the slight competition from my siblings to see who bought the best present for the kids. I didnt win this year, the doctor set was the winner hands down. Poppy immediately knew what to do and began giving everyone injections.

My Dad retired this month. Went to his retirement party, and it was really inspiring to see the other side of my Dad, who was a boss and mentor to people and to see where he took a company for 30 years. Proud of him and what I can also achieve if I work to it.

So its now down to me and what on earth I want to do with my career. It is great at my work and so many opportunities.. I get anxious as there is so many different places I could go and part of the problem is that. My creative side is always stunted and shunned, and my side that likes to be in control does not allow anything.

My words suck today. Will try again soon.