Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Puff

My fingers can sit so peacefully on the keys of the computer, they do not have to move. Sometimes they kinda just go, "We would rather not move, it is nice just resting here." But then I gotta make them. No, not make them as they are more than happy to type, especially if there is purpose behind the writing. But then you look up, they look up, and see that what they typed is actually about them and not about any other particular topic.

I missed London tonight. It has been two years since I was last there and in a kid's head, two years is like the gap of time between your first day of kindergarten and your ability to know your three times tables and read the entire series of Grug books. Do not ask me what Grug is, but in summary he is a mop of hair that talks in a really basic way and he goes on mundane adventures that as children, we read about.Here is a photo:



So yes, London. Long time. Miss. Hopefully 2012 could bring an end to the dry spell. Though sometimes I wonder if it is better to invest money in a place I have never been. Is there only so many times you can walk along the Thames and sing the tune to the alphabet, which I might add, is the same tune as Twinkle Twinkle! Possibly, but nothing can take away at the magic behind sitting in a Roman fort in middle of winter beside Hadrian's Wall and imagine a Roman soldier sitting there, 2000 years ago. How about I travel to North Korea. I hear there is a demilitarized zone and it is like Pleasantville.

I sat at the Tram stop today. I looked across at a sign that was stuck on a brick wall. Puffs of smoke came from behind the wall, a heated conversation.

Monday, December 26, 2011

Little Girl Marketing

Kids really do observe so much more than we assume. And if you remember, we all had ideas both then and now.

This girl vents about the unfair blue and pink coding on kids presents. Love.

Hail

The highlight of my Christmas this year, was stepping out of a 7 Eleven with Cal and walking down towards my house when it suddenly started pouring. We bolted down the street and stood under a tree in some little alcove at the entrance to a house. Cal was really not that impressed with the situation as he had a headache, but I couldnt stop laughing.

I loved going out in the rain as a kid and putting my feet in the concrete gutter, feeling the water rushing over my feet. The water had a temperature that was never threatening and you could feel this slight force, willing to go to a lower place. The water itself seemed in shock of its collective landing in the neighbourhood and now ran together to a better place.

So now I was amongst a storm near home and it wasnt gonna stop anytime soon. The road became a river and then the hail started. Little plops everywhere were heard and white balls bobbed amongst the river though quickly melted to become part of the brown body moving fast down the hill. I looked up under the tree we were standing under and the hail bounced at random through the branches, some gently falling on us. I decided it would be best if I got Cal to my house sooner rather than later so suggested we make a run for it. He nodded reluctantly and we ran, and I just kept laughing even harder. Fully clothed and water half way up my calves with my shoes fully submerged. No care whatsoever and there is so much freedom in that. All these little adventures piled up into one set. Must get across this little ravine, ok done. Now to see if I can get to there... yep, done. Quick check to make sure no cars are coming, it would be easy to spot me jumping around. We were back at my front door pretty quickly and I was kind of disappointed. Getting us both towels, Cal sat down relieved and I just panted, and grinned. We had a white Christmas, just not the usual kind.

New thing for next year, the beginning of a bigger piece of writing. I saw "The Iron Lady" today and it really was beautiful. I am happy with the many jobs I am doing but I also want to make a difference as anyone does. And I feel I am pretty much ready for my contribution to that difference. Smile, it doesnt hurt. Well, it does if you have stiches in your lip. Or if a gecko is stuck on your cheek, its head resting on your upper lip cause he/she is kinda upset with how mundane your nostril hairs are. So maybe smile inside if you can't physically.

Sunday, December 25, 2011

It's Tristmas...

Pretty much before the sun was even up, I would always sneak into my sister's room on Christmas morning and whisper "Lou, its Tristmas!" It became a tradition and even when I was living overseas I always timed it right, and call her at the crack of dawn on Christmas in Australia and inform her of the seasonal timetable. Traditions huh.

Merry Christmas all! I got Christmas cookies to make.

And this video pretty much sums up what Christmas is like in Australia, hit it Olivia!

Thursday, December 22, 2011

Warm nights

If I had to list some of my favourite things, well I am not having to but I will list them out of want, one of them would have to be stepping outside on a summer evening. I just walked from my home, through the MCG Park and across a footbridge to the river by the City. Cicadas were singing in the night air, the gentle warm breeze, and when I stepped onto the footbridge I felt the warmth from the concrete hit back at me. I sat there with Cal in silence as we looked over the city. That gentle roar of a thousand noises which is so quiet but fills your ears, that sums up the many lights and smells in this Australian city in summer. Not a polluted smell but more a smell of warmth and grass. There were a few bush rats pitching in to make the noise complete in the garden nearby. A night I will remember for its simplicity and it making me experience one of my favourite things.

I had an email today, from a young fella who has emailed me a few times now. He reads my blog and I feel really quite honoured that it has had an impact on him. And that in itself inspires me to just write. Write because it makes me happy but also because it has helped someone else be themselves.

I was chased by a possum a while ago, I approached him/her/it and usually they are quite timid. Nope, this possum edged towards me, like I was the timid animal and then launched itself towards me. In the moment (I was also with someone else who will remain nameless to include them in the embarrassment) your mind only computes, "some unknown creature is running towards me with death in its eyes, RUN". So we ran, bolted back up the street, and this wasnt just some suburban street, it was a street right next to a major train station. This is where the situation was wrong in the first place, we should have assumed it was a possum on crack. That and the froth coming out of its mouth. We are still debating whether there was froth but it justifies our running the other way. The possum continued to run after us but then got distracted by a bin. A young fella was walking the way we just had and dodged eye contact with us, two grown adult men freaked out by a casual possum. We were walking the wrong way anyways. Have you ever walked along a street and then realised you were walking the wrong way? So you look at your phone, pretend to call someone and change direction chatting to a pretend person, this way making it look like you have just been told by the person on the phone to turn around. When really who is actually taking that much care or notice on which way some random stranger is walking and that it is not out of a science fiction novel if the person changes direction? Glad I got that out.. moving on.

My Cousin shared this on his wall the other day. I liked it, and even though it is a woman singing with a tiny voice and big emotions (a friend says that my music taste covers this category) it is quite a real song with that dreamy quality that everyone should have.

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

11 Posts..

At the beginning of this year I saw that I had made 54 posts last year. That is just over one a week. I wanted to write more than that this year though I am at the crappy number of 44 posts. SO, I am gonna write words for the the next 11 days and I will beat my 2010 posts by the outstanding number of ONE.

So at the beginning of today I the prospects of one kinda average job. By the end of the day I have full time work for all of January at another job that I had no idea about this morning and also found another awesome opportunity. I was a bit of a Debbie Downer when I woke up but yeah Cal pretty much told me to snap out of it as you never know what is coming your way. Yep, he was right.

So, HOME ALONE is on the agenda tonight I believe. It is essential Christmas season viewing and then HOME ALONE 2. Just like I bake Christmas cake every year, I try and keep up with another few traditions.

I bought a Christmas Tree today, and a real one. It is planted in a white paint tin and about a foot high. I think due to to the fact the last time I had a real one it was a cut one, I was highly traumatised at feeling like the tree had a wasted life, its only destiny was a week period sitting inside dying. Is that even a bit too extreme a belief for Vegetarians?

PS how good is my star I made for the top of the tree? Cal looked at it once and struggled not to laugh, but then he just laughed. Way offensive.



And picture this.. awkward 12 year old students holding christmas bells on stage, with Amy Grant blaring across the school gym, drowing out the out of tune students for the Christmas concert. It is early December and the gym stinks of sweat and the air is thick in Australian summer. And this song wont finish fast enough... AND you have my grade 6 Christmas concert thanks to Amy Grant.

Sunday, December 11, 2011

Stayin

I am hanging cards from my venetian blinds. You ever realised that if you put your head against the outside of the window you can read some of people's cards. Yeah neither!!

It has been funny, since finishing up with my job at Tutankhamaun, everyone is asking me if I am moving back to Sydney. No... No I am not.

Said goodbye to my friends at Tut in the last few days and it has been quite sad. It has not really sunk in that I will not go back there and expect the unexpected. From dumb questions about whether the artifacts are from Egypt, to crazy guests and random failures of equipment. Farewell Uncle Tut.

So saying goodbye means saying hello to the life of doing not much at all. Really hope this is not for a while because it lets me think WAY too much. From realising I daydreamed for 20 minutes about whether a forklift could lift a house, to choosing books to read that I then proceed not to read. But if you stack the books next to your bed, it looks like you are reading all of them at once, mixing up some deep abstract book with a light fiction book. So that if someone finds the pile, they will go, oh he is just so well read. But really.. I am now kinda concerned who this person is that I would not already know. Some creepy stranger who can see through the crack in the blind and wondering how intelligent I am? OR maybe some hip bug that is crawling up my wall and is totally inspired by my reading material. But at the end of the day, I have not read them. The hip bug will just THINK I am cool. But who cares what a bug things anyways... yeah?

I am in a cafe and there are three young kids, assuming they are brothers as there is one woman with them and she looks just a tad drained. They are wrapping themselves around the stainless steel legs of the table they are sitting at, and bashing each other. If I did that, I would be asked to leave. Mainly cause my imaginary friends were bashing me up too much and I would be playing dead on the cafe floor in front of some poor lady who has not finished her flat white. Er... I say that in a light way, not a psychotic way. So yeah... LOOK! Christmas lights!

Less than a week to Christmas. I like the lead up way more than the day itself. The day itself is always a bit too much of a "Hey I am here! Make the most of me as I am not here for another year!

Cal has now arrived in Melbourne for good. His arriving has reminded me about my own arrival here in Melbourne almost a year ago now. Any change such as moving cities really is quite a whirlwind in your head. You can start thinking about whether this was the right decision or not, when really only time will answer these questions. I have no regrets and love the decision and over the past few days have been reminded of this. Oh and I also had a lychee margarita and that was bloody nice.

Santa and Anubis want to wish everyone a Merry Christmas! I may have them as key rings.. and Santa only seems relevant at this time of year. Funny that..



OH and I made a sandcastle.

Wednesday, November 30, 2011

It's time.

This has spread like wildfire and so it should. I am just doing my part in case those of you who have not seen it, can see it now. Sums it up, and filmed so beautifully in my home town of Sydney. It really IS time.

Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Keep still

Sometimes it feels like the key piece of advice is to physically keep still so your head doesnt move. You can't move because all your current knowledge and thoughts may fall out, just drop out of some brain cell and dribble into space and not come back. I have read and seen some really inspiring pockets of wisdom in the past few days and I am so worried it will be lost. But the funny thing is that I don't want to write them down as it may be lost somewhere just as easily.

Pretty mentally exhausted right now with the loom of my job almost at the end. And the uncertainty, can be so romantic but then there are the days when it is just plain inconvenient. "I dont know what my next job is", I can say with a grin.

Just spent the weekend in Sydney. Had a few days where at the end of them my soul felt full, like I had spoilt it. And I was with Cal for most of it. Some of the highlights were Trapeze lessons and my good school bud Bede's wedding. Amazing weather all weekend and I even swam at a real beach, not like the ripples of the bay down here in Melbourne. Sorry Melbourne.

Trapeze lesson. Cal bought us a lesson as an adventure. I was fully on board but had not really processed what was involved until 15 minutes prior where I became quiet and unnerved. We were walking to the destination in Centennial Park in the city, wheeling my suitcase (it was actually my boss's overnight bag as she couldnt handle me taking my old gym bag away) and Cal noticed I went quiet. Finally the land of Trapeze appeared in the distance and it kinda clicked I was going to go swing on a Trapeze. I still dont know what they call it, the bar? Within 10 minutes they made us do stretches, hang off a bar 2 metres from the ground and then we were climbing up the ladder one by one ready to swing off for the first time. I would say it was a surreal experience and also loved that they just threw us into the deep end. After two hours I managed to swing and jump out and be caught by one of the trainers swinging from the other bar. Oh that and a broken toe and bleeding hand.



I got to read the Bible at my mate Bede's wedding this weekend. It really was an honour, because to me it was a good old friend from Christian days who showed so much love and acceptance back then and now and simply wanted me to read at his wedding. The passage was 1 John 4:9-12 and this is about God and his love for us, and the fact we cannot see God means we must love one another to express the love that God has for us. There is a lot of truth in this whether you believe in God or not, loving and accepting one another is such a basic need. When you do this, so much is easier. I stood up there proud to be holding such a symbol from my past and still see the relevance now, and also celebrating an old friend finding a companion to share his life with.



At the reception there was a polaroid camera. And it is just so cool right now to take photos with these, or more so, use a hipstamatic function on our iPhone. These are real and we had quite the laugh doing this, reminded me of 2001/2 Physics class at SSCS.




And today is the final day of Movember. And aint my Mo just beautiful... It has been fun but also been super to support organisations such as Prostate Cancer, that has affected my own family. Raised $380, thanks for those who donated! I was very chuffed and much higher than I thought it would be.



How much does it suck when you spend too much time pushing against a door that you then glance down at and it says "push". Hello December.

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

The Holstee Manifesto: Lifecycle Video

I dont do this that often but this brightened my day because I am more than happy to agree with this manifesto. Well shot video too.

Enjoy your day.

Running

So, if you ever feel like going for a 14KM run, try it. You will be surprised how much further you can run if you have lots of people running with you. I ran the City2Sea with people from work, was so much fun! I could now go into some metaphorical tangent on how if you have lots of people with you on a journey the journey is easier. But will stop.... there.



Yellow, green, blue and red gumballs. What one would you be bummed at if it came out of the machine and which would you be happy about? Green is my happy gumball, yellow is my sad.

So my adventure with King Tut gets closer to the end. Really starting to get reflective of it (you cannot half tell, since I am writing about it in a blog) and I am so bloody thankful I took this role on. The people I have met, the experience I have had and to be looking after such a beautiful set of artifacts from a civilization so long ago has been simply an honour. And the dolphin mascott has been inspirational. The hunt continues for my next role.

One of my best buds Adam made an interesting observation yesterday. Compared me to the Tortoise in Tortoise and the Hare (I have never petted a Tortoise, maybe one day though). He said I am happy to run the race slow and just be patient with what comes my way. Still feel I should be more proactive! If I was to be any creature in a fable though, I would want to be the amusing penguin in that fable that I just made up in my head. Oh silly penguin, he is so funny... and you learn so much from him and his ways.

In my last blog I mentioned Cal. In a lot of ways I dont really even want to mention him in my blog too much, cause this story is one I want to keep close and just for me. But will just say, it is an adventure where I have a big grin on my face.

I was walking to work the other morning and walked under a giant fig tree. I will call it a fig tree cause it sounds better than a latin name. I dont wanna get all intellectual. That would make me sound smart and have good grammar and stuff like yeah? The path ran under this beautiful big tree and the early morning light along with the stillness of the still sleeping city made a shroud over me. Very peaceful, was almost expecting Mr Fox to appear, he didnt though. I then noticed a man, he was laying on one of the roots of the tree. His eyes were closed and he was mouthing words. He looked about 40 and dressed in casual clothes, not the kind a homeless fella would wear. He had just come to stop and be still and I couldnt have chosen a better place to do that. Well you would be fairly still in a straight jacket but yeah, another kind of still. I moved on, noone wants a random stranger walking by to stop and just watch you laying there. Well I dont.

I am also halfway through Movember today! Where you grow a Mo and donate to charity. Part of it was also running the race I mentioned. The trouble though with my Mo is it is long but so light compared to my head hair colour and looks pathetic. Example...



Though if anyone wants to support me, money is going towards Prostate Cancer and Beyond Blue, an organisation supporting Mental Health.

http://mobro.co/lloydjones

I am concerned my wallpaper on my phone is of a Jam label, but come on who doesnt like Jam. Jello for you Americans. And it is kinda healthy if you think about it. Mashed up fruit with sugar. We all need sugar and we all need jam. And especially rasberry jam. Cause you can imagine sailing across a sea of it and you could smell it in the air, fresh seabreeze than smelt of sugar and rasberries.



And one last thing, this was blaring across the tent where I was hanging out with Cal after the race on Sunday. Just made me happy, gotta like a band called Talking Heads.

Thursday, November 3, 2011

Brown Paper

I opened my letterbox today and there was a brown envelope in there. And of course there was one little snail on the corner. The stupid snails have come back. I have accepted a compromise with them, where I leave junk mail in there as food, and they usually dont touch fresh letters. Deal. No Deal, this immature young snail obviously didnt get the memo from the older wiser snails, dont touch day old mail. Silly loser.
So yes, the envelope. I didn't recognise the handwriting and it had the same stamp my mum had placed on the postcard I also received today. The post card was from some tree top world where she climbed a tall tree. Good on her! NO idea where this place was but hey, my Mum sends me random postcards and that is special in itself. I brought both the items inside and dumped my backpack on the airbed that is currently in my living room. My mate Jon (the one who had been volunteering as a nudist farm in Byron Bay) is crashing at mine until he moves into his new home in a week. One of my lounges was upside down on part of the airbed, I had placed it there, it seemed a great place to dump it so I could dry my washing with it. I just reread that sentence, yeah don't ask.
BACK to the envelope, stop distracting me. I opened it up and instantly knew who it was from. Cal. I met Cal in July when I was in Sydney visiting family and it ended up being a pretty dreary visit, wet weather and a lot of cancellations with friends, on top of me getting the flu. One of the final days, I had been in touch with this fella and he asked me to meet him. My gut said I shouldn't, as he lives in Sydney and I live in Melbourne. What if I liked him, that would be bad, no? Then the other part of my gut won. What if I liked him, that would be good, yes? Caught a cab and our brunch meeting began with me standing next to a roast chicken store, watching a little girl attack her dog with her pink PVC umbrella, and him walking up the street towards me. Hello Cal.
It was a good brunch and I walked away thinking it was a sweet little chapter to have met a nice person. I also felt proud of myself, I was so mature about it, at peace and just content to recognise a connection. But to focus on what life is currently presenting to myself, back in reality in my new home of Melbourne.
So I slid the letter out and unfolded it. Double-sided and in flowing old style cursive writing. The paper was the same colour as the envelope, classic and smooth brown paper. It was him to a C (C being C for.. Cal. People usually say "it is them to a T" but C rhymes with T, clever. On same page?). I saw the back page first and saw him signing off. I grinned. Letters are amazing, they will always beat emails hands down. They are something physical that has traveled to your hands through a postal system, your eyes scanning real paper and ink. You can see the small imperfections (or if its my handwriting, my beautiful illegible doctor handwriting) of the person who wrote it, yet those imperfections become the personality of the letter. The thought flowing from mind to pen and paper, to finally flowing from paper to processing of that thought in the receiver. Ok ok, you get it. Letters=equal amazing in my eyes.
It was a beautiful letter and so well expressed, leaving me standing there just smiling. Smiling felt like such a limitation of how I felt inside.

Somehow I was convinced to dress up at work. And be the only person at work, who was dressed up for the day. Howard Carter was the fellow who discovered the tomb. It was to be 89 years tot he day that he had discovered it in 1922, so I was asked to dress up in 1920's aristocratic clothing for the day. I gotta admit though, I love wearing a suit. And wearing one with tails was bloody awesome. In the end I enjoyed it, more because of the two types of reactions from guests/staff. Either they looked at me and smiled and had curiosity about them as to what on earth I was doing. Then there were many who looked at me, didnt bat an eyelid and continued on their way. Melbourne indoctrinates people to expect crazy dressed up people.





Marissa and I went to Phillip Island. ONLY ever go to Phillip Island if you really really need to see the penguins. There is nothing else on that island that is worth seeing. I repeat, only if you want to be stuck in a tourist trap with thousands of other tourists watching little penguins come up from the beach. Marissa and I didnt even see this, but we DID get to see the Phillip Island Chocolate Factory and also Pirate Putt Putt Golf. We also saw an animal sanctuary through a cafe. One enclosure had a fake goanna in it. We sat and ate "home made pizza" while we took delight in watching tourists walk up, look at the goanna for about a minute and wondering if this goanna was just really sleepy, dead, or fake. Our day was made.

We had a day of hot weather yesterday. A day. Thanks Melbourne.

I was going to put up a video about Doctor Who I was introduced to by my friend Joseph but then thought, no, I wont.

Friday, October 28, 2011

Great Expectations

Does anyone else find baby goats bloody cute? And not bloody that is linked to the word slaughter, but bloody like.. "amazing". Nah that doesnt sound any better.

It is near the end of October 2011. And this time last year I was in the USA having an adventure. NYC to be precise if I was to look at where I was this day last year, wondering around Central Park by myself and being asked to take photos of couples who were also exploring Central Park. This highlighted the fact I was alone. Not in a bad way, I just am also more the person to do the Gen Y, take a photo of yourself, type shot. But only when noone was looking. Asif I would wanna see anyone watching me take a self photo at some tourist location. That would make me look like a loser yeah? Well they can be the losers.. yeah... So yes, the trip was amazing and a year on, I still appreciated the time and the company. Yes I was not alone for most of the trip, just a lot of NYC. I need to give the city another chance when I have likeminded friends travelling with me.

Speaking of NYC, is 30 Rock as good as people go on about? I find it amusing at times but there are too many annoying characters to make it amazing.

So. I ate a rissole. What IS a rissole, the Americans may ask? And the Alaskans. Well it is like a large meatball that is flattened, thicker than a beef patty and is cooked often on an Aussie BBQ. Why am I informing the internet that I ate one. Well,it wasnt just any old rissole. The pub I was at, had a buffet dinner. You paid $7.50 and could eat all you wanted from a selection of potato salad, caesar sald, sausages, chicken bits (cause I am unsure what part of the chicken's form they were from) and rissoles. I had two rissoles and thought, "yum". Later that evening the buffet was packed up and I happened to be standing nearby. I cant deal with seeing food going to waste, so I was apalled to see them place the leftover meat in the alfoil tray and then this tray thrown in the bin. I mentioned to a mate with me that I could have had another rissole. He said, "Well why dont you?" I am always prepared to take on some bit of a dare. So I reached down and took a rissole out of the bin. Yes, I said that sentence. I justified and hey, I am still justifying that it was in a metal tray on the top of the bin. Others argue back, Lloyd, it was in the bin.
So I took a bite. Before I did, I noticed mine had a piece of cheese or mustard on top. It was inside a badly lit pub so couldnt tell. And then I chewed. I got the sudden texture and flavour of minted chewing gum combining with beef flavour. That was not cheese and/or mustard but gum. Some random person's gum. I froze, trying not to allow my senses to continue to inform me, gum and beef are in your mouth. This did not work.
You know those situations where you are standing in a group and you just did something a tad embarrassing, yet you want to pretend you didnt. Yep, that was me. Though everyone was slightly aware I had eaten it but if I spat it out my only option would be to do that into my hand (all class here!) The whole experience was worse inside my mouth than the potential embarrassment so I spat it out.
"Um, did you realise that it was from the bin and your morals fought against you?", Said a mate.
"Yeah.. it was cold.."
Small chuckle followed.
But then.. no.. the story of what happened, I couldnt keep it in. It was apalling and needed to share.
"There was gum on that rissole"
You can picture their reactions if it is anything like your own right now, and I am still being called Dumpster Diver...

A good friend of mine messaged me yesterday, informing me he wished to take a break from our friendship. He listed his reasoning and wished me all the best with everything. Naturally I was surprised and also baffled as to his reasoning. And I am not going to use my blog to defend myself, I am always happy to put up my hand if I am doing something wrong or if I suck at something. People are the most important thing to me. But my response simply is, some friendships you fight for, sometimes you cant. It is sad either way, and dislike disappointing people. We all have great expectations somewhere along the line.

My mate Joseph would like me to knit jumpers for penguins who are effected by the oil spill in NZ. I only have red wool, will they be confused? Would red penguins be outcasts?



I always find I am easily distracted by Wikipedia. I click from one article to the next as they all link in with each other. I was asked just before, "what are you up to?". Naturally I was reading a Wikipedia article on the mystery behind Australia's old Prime Minister Harold Holt who went missing and presumed dead off the coast of Victoria in the 1960s. And before that, I wanted to know about penguin jumpers.

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Oats

Oats are sitting in a clear plastic tub beside my desk. Supposedly they have been doing so since one of the first weeks of starting at my current job. I could eat porridge everyday of the year. Except when I wanted Vegemite toast or Corn Flakes. And somehow I wonder if there is judgemental thoughts that I still have these same rolled oats in the container and why have I not eaten them? The air inside too stale? Or maybe they just are not organic, steel-cut oats. Cause a book said once that its what you gotta eat. The cheap pack may have been cut by a second best pair of scissors.

I have been wanting to write about my adventure to Hobart. I only really realised how much of a story it is until I have verbally told people a few times now. And hey maybe it IS a verbal story that makes it a story? I may be setting myself up for a fall. But I do notice I do a lot of things these days so they can be stories. Isnt that what life is for? Dont worry, next entry will be simply the story, a teaser is awesome aint it. A flight to Hobart and back in one day, that wasnt paid by me but a complete stranger.

I went to Sydney last weekend and landed back to Melbourne last week. I had an amazing time for several reasons.

Though how did I initially get to Melbourne airport to head to Sydney you ask? That is usually the next question.
Well I had a text from a mate the night before I was flying out and he said. "Hi mate, me and my friend are on our way to Melbourne. We are moving to Melbourne and are 4 hours away! We have been volunteering on a nudist farm in Byron Bay for the last four months and now my mate is looking for a space in Melbourne where he can busk without having a license as he is broke."
It is the sort of text most people receive on a Friday night and so I shrugged and asked him where he was staying.
"Some place just on the outskirts of Melbourne, sleeping in our van".
Of course! Then naturally I thought, well my place is free for the next four days so I would let them stay at mine. I offered, he was stoked and they headed to mine. They said they would drop me off at the airport the next morning as a small thank you. I obliged and thought that was really nice and we said pleasantries and went to sleep. Bright and early we jumped into this van, that was scattered with boys stuff. They had to shift a lot of random shoes and gas bottles out of the way so I could fit in. And then we were off! Navigating through the CBD in the early hours of a Saturday was simple and we drove up onto the freeway. The E-Tag chimed in and both of them went, "Thanks Christians!". Supposedly the previous owners were a Christian couple who sold the old Tarago van for $900. Though seems they had forgotten to deregister the E-tag for tollways.
As it got lighter and the airport drew near, I was staring off in front of me. The front car seat where my mate sat looked like a front car seat. Though I noticed little whisps of smoke. Well, maybe smoke, or maybe steam? "Er.. guys.. there is some sort of gas like substance rising out of your seats..."
"Ohhh she is doing it again! Cool down baby, cool down.." Seems the van was heating up, and we passed the 2.5KM sign to the airport. I looked at my watch and I had 25 minutes to go.
"Do you mind if we pull over and cool her down?"
What other option did we really have.
Pulled over. Stopped. Opened the front car seat and exposed the engine, and a gush of steam escaped, peeling into the back seat with me and five odd shoes and a sleeping bag. This reminded me of the time when I was 7 and our family van broke down in the snow on a family ski holiday. That was not fun. And we got to know the town of Cooma way too well.
The boys had forgotten to place the cap back on the cool thingy. They filled it up with water and screwed it on. Seat clicked back into place, boys jumped in and doors shut. Engine started and indicator clicked on, we were on our way again. She chugged along and steered up the ramp to the departures. Thank you Tarago! With time to spare.

I walked into a wall inside my own Exhibition yesterday. You would think that after 8 months of walking through the same space I would not, but no, my eyes were still adjusting to a darker part of the galleries and SMACK. It also had to be during a really busy period. And as a lot of humans do, just kept walking and pretended it did not happen. The security guard and my colleague Kitty did not pretend this did not happen.

Back to thoughts on Sydney, I got to see my new nephew, Eden. He looked a bit pissed off that he was outside of the womb. As you would be, so many sights and smells and noises that you just suddenly have thrown around you and will continue to have happen to you for the rest of your life. The smiles will begin to come.

I also got to spend a sunset by Sydney harbour. It really cannot be beaten in its beauty, and with the warm spring air and the stillness around, it was beautiful. Caleb was with me and we got to have fun taking photos and being a bit creative, subtly trying to outdo each other with our ideas. That part was fun. This was a combined effort:




And this was all Caleb's idea this time:



I also got to visit my other brother, sister in law and their two awesome little girls. It is special to come back each time and see how much they have subtly changed and how their personalities keep sprouting and forming. Last time I saw my littlest niece she was quite shy and still quite baby like, three months later she is a cheeky and happy little girl, very keen to cling onto me and watch everything. Now this might just sound a tad gushy from a proud uncle and yes, apologies. But it just really makes you appreciate every little step.



And this is one of my favourite songs right now. Groove it up!!

Thursday, September 22, 2011

Messing

Wow I just stood up again, after sitting at this screen, some part of me has this fear in writing. Distraction supposedly protects me from writing. Wait, microwave just beeped. Cookie that was frozen is now not frozen, I will come back. OK I am eating the cookie. Pretty terrible. Who decides to produce and sell citrus, sultana and oat cookies? Not I, I decide to purchase them. Now I really have nothing more to say about the cookie, other than it is now stuck to the roof of my mouth and the citrus taste is regretful, possibly even apologetic.

What is so bad about sitting here and just writing? The clock keeps ticking and the fridge keeps humming, the birds outside keep singing. And before you know it, it turns into an appalling reflective poem. The whoosh of the wind taps my loose window panes and the snails... ok vomit vomit vomit.

The fear inside comes from thinking that, someone else writes, lots of people write. And they must be better and smarter and wittier than I am so why even bother starting sometimes. I think a lot of us can get like that. Or we just do not have something good enough to say. If we crap on about feelings or the onomatopoeia of... nah that word sounded good but totally forgotten what it means so will drop that train of thought. The fear also of screwing up. When you are given something good, you wanna hold it, whether it is physical or it was an event or an experience. You want to treasure it and not take it for granted. Cup it in your hands, peek inside and grin. But the wind may pick up and may blow it out of your hands. Or it may seep out, lacking breath. Though the key word being MAY. And the key word is forgotten and to protect yourself you say WILL. So you can easily give up and accept this WILL happen so why bother holding it. Let it go. Elliot the plant doesnt think like this, he hasnt moved all morning. There are some wild winds outside and every little leaf and branch outside is knocking around wherever the wind chooses to shake them next. Yet Elliot is still, in the foreground, totally calm and unaffected from the flurry outside. But screw it. There is also the other side. That wild wind, that lack of oxygen or just simple badly designed structure, cannot stop events, experiences. They happen and will continue to happen. And I have something to say, as does everyone. But I can only speak for me, and will continue to talk, continue to create. And good things happen. Cringe worthy words yep, but because overuse of phrases such as these have sucked the meaning out of them, doesnt mean I cant squeeze my eyes shut and smile. Sometimes your gut just says it all.

Now for all those who tuned out, hello. I was five once (or twice) and my aunty sat on a log beside the fire. We were down at the holiday house in Manyana (when I say down, I mean down from Sydney) and this log had been sitting there for ages. It was a summer night and the ocean could be clearly heard in the distance. Mosquito repellent and smoke married together with the warm evening, to create that distinct southern coast Australian smell. The fire was quite close to this log, and it sneakily licked out every now and then towards the wood. As my aunty sat there casually, something inside the log was not so casual. Something felt uncomfortable and unsafe, so decided to work out what this was. Sorry, some THINGS, not just one thing. My Mum was there also and notified my aunty, not to move. Her shoulder, her other shoulder, her left arm, and three different places on her back now had alarmed and anxious spiders quivering on them. Now come on, what person decides to go, "Ha, OK I wont move"? Though we really should be considerate of the poor spiders, freaked out by the heat threatening their home. No, rational thinking there. My aunty stood up and shook, shook shook shook. And also did a bit of human verbal diarrhea that meant she was panicking. The kinds of sounds I couldn't even type, cause they would sound Russian or something. The spiders went flying, some landed on my mum, some on the cool grass, and some landed in the fire. Option 1, 2 or 3, they didnt get to pick one. Nor did my mum. I have attached a photo, to show you what they look like. Yes the clock says "prestige":



I am not too scared of them and would be fine picking one up. I had to when they would crawl across my lap in my van I drove at 17. They loved the van as a home and so when I drove their home (in a slight jerky motion back then) of course they would be anxious. Though the screaming friends in the passenger seat as I hurtled along the freeway did not appreciate my calm approach. Trapped inside the van, jumping over into the back seat and getting stuck on the gear stick in the process, one foot stuck in the seatbelt. Though the spider I reckon had a sense of humour and would walk along the ceiling towards them, my friends shoe missing the spider by a mile and hitting my head instead. I had to pull over in the end, not cause I cared about my friend but cause my eyes were so filled with tears from laughing so much.

We could totally analyse why I am talking about spiders, but we shan't. Lets just listen to the wind.

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Puff Paint

Ok, since I admitted it a few weeks ago, I will again now.

I made a shirt in craft at school when I was 11. When I say made, I just painted it. The actual shirt was an old white polo shirt that I found in my brother's drawer. We all needed a white shirt for the activity at school, I forgot and last minute snuck into my brother's room and found the shirt. It was slightly off white, though when it was purchased it would have been "white".
So with my creativity in full swing and a set of puff paints, I decided to paint a Christmas tree, with some presents underneath. Though we all had to put the slogan, "Jesus is the Reason for the Season". So neatly underneath I wrote that. And I had a shirt that I proudly wore to Christmas Carol singing on the corner of the shopping town in Engadine with the other members from Church. I also wore it as a costume, but will tell you about that another time.

So a few weeks have gone by since I last wrote. Elliot the plant has grown, I am successful for now (with the plant that is), and I keep getting to know a fella called Mike. We went down to this beautiful part of the world called Anglesea, just before the start of the Great Ocean Road. I do miss the ocean, one of the sacrifices of moving to Melbourne. You may argue if you are a Melbournite that it is next to the ocean. Yes, technically, yes. But Melbourne, you have a bay, and it is flat and the water a disturbing colour for a bay. One that no desire inside of me decides to nudge me and go, "Hey Lloyd, swim!" Possibly if I was covered in a hot substance, like fire. But the Ocean is about waves and raw white/blues/grays crashing and singing. Mike did oblige nicely and we went down onto the actual beach. It was not swimming weather but at least part of me did nudge me and say, "Hey swimming wouldnt be totally out of the question, no?" And the wind roared back onto us from the Ocean. It was like it was breathing onto us, I opened my mouth and it filled my lungs. Fresh and brilliantly clean. Ocean.. yes I miss you. But the weekend was great and the clash of movie titles occurred. First it was 'Inglorious Bastards' then followed by 'Notting Hill'. Mike has no control over these posts so I will say Mike chose the latter. He loves them movies that make him cry. Joking aside, do people watch sad movies to evoke their own emotions from their own memories? Or is it simply a human being upset over a tragic story that they can relate to as humans? Mutually exclusive perhaps.

Last weekend (the weekend before the ocean weekend) I decided to surprise my Dad for Father's Day. I flew up on Sunday afternoon after work and timed it so he arrived back from Church and there was Lloyd standing on his doorstep to say hello. I had made him a card, I used markers from work and drew a spotty tie and expressed how much I really do value him. Without Dad, aside from the obvious giving me life thing, could not have done many of the amazing adventures in my short life. Through simple support and sometimes the good old parent financial aid, he loves me unconditionally. Even if I make crap cards.

Also met up with the girls from work who were on a luxury weekend away in Sydney. I gate crashed it and then moaned a lot of the time as they continued to do girl things like Yoga (which I was forced to do also) and then flower shopping. All of this was also when I had my pyjamas on as Kitty thought my pyjamas were suitable yoga attire. I thought we were heading straight back to the car, but no. We went to one of the most expensive suburbs in Sydney for brunch. I kinda loved it though. PJs in daring places, kind of like people not knowing you got no underwear on yeah?



They are eating chips.



So am I.

Tutankhamun finishes in another few months and so those flags inside my head (the non-literal kind) remind me that I need to find work. And they will not be lowered until there is some new form of employment I know is to be lined up. There is so much inside of me that I want to explore through my career and it is just the point where I need to choose which part. Or can I involve all parts? No limitations should be applied. Kind of like IKEA but not made in Sweden. Sweden does seem to be a cool destination though, make note to go there.

I wonder how long my flat has been around? Wish I could ask it. Doesnt talk back usually so its establishment date really wont be an exception. Yeah nope, no answer.

Friday, August 26, 2011

Postcard


"I just got your postcard"
"What?"
"I just got your postcard"
"Where did you go?"
"I just got your postcard"
"You went where?"

The skype call distorted, showed half a camping lantern, and half my mum's ear. I decided I would at least amuse myself by continuing to repeat myself.

"I just got your postcard"
"I dont think it is a very good signal"
"No, I dont think so either. I just got your postcard".

The sound of Skype hanging up occurred, and it went back to just the ticking of the clock. A pop up message on the video program filteree through my dimly lit apartment.

Mum: R u there?
Lloyd: Yes
Mum: We... (user is typing).... {wait 30 seconds}... We r not having a good signal.
Lloyd: Yes Mum, we are not. Another time?
Mum is offline.

Hey, it is the thought that counts. She continues to drive around Australia, currently south of Broome. Might see her in December.

On Wednesday I did the random thing of going to a local bar's annual Drag Queen awards. Was a mate's 30th and he thought it would be fun to do. I didnt have to work the next day and my friend Renata from work wanted to come too. One of those nights where nothing was expected (you may see a pattern forming) and we have a lot of funny memories from the evening. One being the fact Renata (female, just to specify) was asked to enter the contest, so she did. She was an absolute champion. Some of the other contestants were not sure if she was female or male, and were quite pushy for her to prove it. I had to apologise to her later for bringing her somewhere that involved her having to prove she was a woman. She laughed. And my other favourite memory was when I walked past a drag queen, and my tie (yes, I was wearing a tie) got hooked on her sequin dress. I just had to look up how to spell sequin. An awkward situation occurred. My tie was hidden underneath a plastic wig and the dress smelt like my neighbour's Rock Eisteddfod outfit from the early 90's. Side step, Rock Eisteddfods were and still are for schools all around Australia to perform in musical style performances (I guess a bit like Glee Club.. kinda??) and most had sequins in and bike pants. I just had to look up how to spell this as well, it is a Welsh word. BACK to the story, so I had no idea how my tie had become attached but the drag queen became a bit distressed as she did not know why I was tugging on her dress.
"Stop it!!"
Shouting over the noise of the pub, "Sorry! My tie seems to have become attached to your dress!"
"Stop it!! Now!!"
Fumbling, my hands became mixed up in masses of brown fake hair, and swirls of makeup smell slightly touched my senses though old beer quickly covered them up again. Others began to watch, wondering why I was slightly bent over this drag queen, like I was biting their back.
"Erm, sorry, tie.. wont.. unclasp or untangle! Hang on!!"
"What are you doing?? It isnt funny!"
"Trying.. to get unstuck.. "
It did not help when others kept trying to push past in the crowded pub. I squinted my eyes and still the tie attached to the Dorothy shoe red sequins. I felt if I yanked it I would either screw up my tie or her dress. I didnt want to do the latter more so. I decided to do the smart thing of walking the way I came and bam, released.
She turned around straight away and looked might impressed (see how I use sarcasm?) and I just shrugged and kept walking. If they didnt hear me the first, second and third time, its just not gonna work.

My mate Damian and I sat in the cinema last week, we went to see a movie called "Hanna" which actually was not too bad. While we were waiting for the curtains to go up, and they actually do at this one, we heard two ladies talking nearby. The only comment that stood out was, "So my friend is doing chemo, but like, the one that does not make your hair fall out. Gosh she has lost so much weight, she looks so good!" Damian and I just looked at each other. I didnt know what to say.

Mandarins in a vase really look better than in the fridge. It is like they are now trying to make a statement, as they slightly sweat it out.

What is going on with this pen? They sell these at work. She just looks.. unsure. Perplexed?





Sunday, August 21, 2011

Fort

When I hear the beginning of the kettle boiling, it makes me think of the times I was gently woken up in the lounge room under a fort of pillows, Dad boiling the kettle. I would hear the gentle distant roar, the kettle waking up from a deep sleep, louder and louder. Click of the kettle and a random clearing of the throat by my dad. Then splash of hot water filling the cold ceramic mug. That really quiet splash but so familiar. Would mean I survived the scary sleep out in the lounge room and I remember the uncertain noises coming from behind the piano when the old kitchen clock said 5:10am. I pushed the pillow wall over next to where my sister was meant to sleep until she chickened out at 9pm last night, just after 'The Bill' finished. She was concerned some chav's from Tooting would get her, she was seven.. And in Australia. Anyways I was the brave one, 11 years old and king of the leather cushion and old blanket cubbyhole. It may not have been the most structurally sound but the heavy Yosemite National Park book on top of the table that held the blanket up only fell on my sister once during setup.

Oh I am on the tram. Two sets of couples were so focused on each other they both forget to hold onto a bloody pole and fall onto me. No apology either, which is fine since I never did apologise to that blind man that time, but no point making excuses.

Magnolia's are out! First symbol winter is dying. Mike pointed out that they remind him of purple flames amongst the trees. I like this image, and bring a fire extinguisher just in case.

Marissa and I went for a spontaneous bike ride the other day. No expectations always lead to surprise. I had no idea how beautiful the scenery is by the Yarra river, we decided to ride along it. Some parts were like Wind in the Willows, some other areas were like Waterworld (the big budget flop which then became successful as a stunt show at Universal Studios), with the boardwalk for the track laid right on the river. In summary, we felt like kids going on a Saturday afternoon adventure! And we both left the day with big grins on our faces, and what more can you ask for in a day of your life? We sat there and watched the sunset over Melbourne, the faint smell of new flowers and ants taking the crumbs of cheese we left.






I had a bath tonight. My bath is about 4 foot long. So I end up having my legs scrunched up against the shower wall to fit my torso in. To an onlooker (not like I would have onlookers in this situation) it must look mighty awkward. It is just a bit less awkward for me, the one experiencing it. And I swear as I have gotten older, my hands wrinkle so much faster in the water. Is this a sign of getting older? And I will admit, I still make my bath a bubble bath. Though my shower gel sucks as bubble bath, the bubbles do not have the right consistency for relaxing. Why? Because they pop too fast and make a lot of noise and so there is no peaceful silence, just that quiet crackle, especially the ones stuck in your ear that you cant get rid of. Yep, so the reason I share this with you is because I was going onto say, I listened to a song. This was the song, reminds me of being up near Bundaberg in QLD and laying in a Spa with the ocean in the background, parrots in the trees and the worries of then were so different to any worries I have now. I am thankful for my worries now. I was not of the past worries. I will say worries just once more. There, worries.


I laid in the bat

Friday, August 19, 2011

Beef and Mushroom Pie

“Two Beef and Mushroom pies?” is announced as the waiter with the sleeve tattoo walked across to the cheap looking table.

“Yes!” Gestured a man with a black jacket (the type sold at one of those stores where they sell jackets for Dads at a low cost). He was at a totally different cheap looking table. Though this one was red cheap, the other a brown tinge cheap. Sleeve tattoo man ignored this as he placed the two pies on the brown table. The two customers at this table seemed willing receivers of these pies and silently accepted.

The jacket man casually yet more awkwardly placed his hand back down again, realizing the pie announcement was not for him. He looked around slightly, if he pretended he didn’t shout out, no one else would know. Maybe he had also ordered two pies that were the beef and mushroom variety, though he was sitting alone and to have two pies is greedy. Not like he cared about that I am sure. Back to the sports tips in the paper. The broadsheet newspaper took up all of the room on his part of the table, along with the space next to him. It is one of those unsaid rules of personal space at a café table, keep to your space, yet he had broken it. The paper was laying across the space of a young man who had flushed cheeks and a flushed red jumper to match. Red jumper guy looked at the paper then at the man, then back at the paper. It was half turned, ready for the next page of sport jargon, while he waited for his coffee. He was not staying.

The pie still hadn’t come, did he even order a pie or does he like to just accept any food coming his way? His wife Kathy was at home and so this café was brilliant for his whereabouts currently. Whether he had ordered a pie or not.

The smooth slide of a plate was heard, looking up, his pie arrived. One pie, beef and mushroom.

The little girl at the smaller cheap brown table swung her legs and grinned at jacket man. She was with Daddy and her Panini was bigger than her head and her forced pigtails. The kind of pigtails her mother was trying to encourage and tend to, like the mother’s garden hedge. They were quaint, cute and also open to other compliments by passers by, both the hedge and pigtails alike. Daddy had a pie. Pie’s are popular. Though the build up and drip of a chunk of corn and chicken that fell to the plate referred this pie to the non-beef and mushroom variety. Pies yes, though not all one variety. Though the word variety is still relevant. Daddy constantly kept his face down to his plate and ate, the girl averting her eyes back to Daddy, as Jacket man was not entertaining and nor did he smile back when she did. Looking up into her milkshake cup, metal and frosted, slight pink milk dribble down the side . She reached up to stir it casually, Daddy still staring at his pie, there seemed to be waves of concern over his face. Was it the pie causing this or the argument waiting for him later on?

Jacket man slid his chair, making a loud and attentive sound. The “I am leaving and paying” kind of sound, his chair was his instrument. Walking up to the counter, giving exact change then he left, headed back to his wife Kathy, Friday afternoons meant Sudoku and Kathy always needed help. Not the kind of help he enjoyed to give, but his duty that he had prolonged enough this afternoon.


The waitress smiled at me as she approached, “Wow, I love that sticker on your laptop!”

“Yeah, do you understand it? “

“Apple Juice!”

“Yep, you are one of the few to work that out!”

“Well its cool, where did you get it?”

“So you understand the sticker says ‘juice’ and has the shape of a juice box and then the apple symbol on my mac goes in the middle of the sticker overlay therefore combining the two and causing it to look like an ‘apple juice’ image?”

“Yeah, didn’t I confirm this before”

“I was checking.”

“Ok. So where did you get it?”

“I bought it online, I bought two as I was unsure which one to get. They were five bucks each, the other is ET interacting with the apple sign.”

“What store?? I am excited, I love it”

“Are you sure you don’t love me?”

“What?”

Awkward silence. Thankfully the other waiter, tattoo sleave walked up to the conversation, “Are you guys talking about the sticker on his mac?”

“Yep, sure are.”

Sleave waiter walks up futher, “It is really cool! Apple Juice!”

“Oh so you get it too??”

“Yeah! I used to watch the Game Show ‘Catch Phrase’ so I am good with things like that!”

“Well done, you guys are a rarity!”

Both waiters smiled, and headed back behind the counter. They then continued to chat, one making a blue milkshake, a very non-descript flavor might I add, the other pushing buttons on a microwave. The microwave was black.

Forced pigtail girl and Daddy stand up and go pay. A faint smile is made from Daddy to his daughter and change is handed over. She is allowed to buy a Mars Bar also and she grins, grabbing his hand as they walk out. The cool overcast air runs over them as they exit, turning left, not right.

OK, back to writing. I am not the type to go, “Right I need plotlines and characters, who, what, where, when, why and how.” Does that matter, or does that mean I wont ever compose a story. Do musicians just play what sounds good or do they plan what climaxes and what mellow areas of the song will exist, prior to listening. I think both musicians would exist. They do exist.

“How much is a square metre of coffee?” the guy wiped his glasses while asking.

“I don’t even know what that means? Said his friend, he also had glasses but was not cleaning his.

His wife sat next to him, her face shiny yet her face dull. So it was the shiny dull look that so often occurred with her, and her sister. She was totally not interested in her husband with glasses and his mate with glasses’ conversation. She was actually assessing the lady’s shoes that just walked in.

These shoes made no sound but yet they really did scream, “Hello, I was made far away from here”. The owner’s necklace said nothing. Though she (the owner, not the necklace, necklace’s do not have a sex in this story) was another middle aged woman with blonde streaked hair that lay flat and did not necessarily promote volume, informed the Apple Juice waitress she was waiting for “someone”.

Apple Juice waitress then smiled and filled up the China Jasmine tea I ordered with hot water. She knows I do not like it strong, because the tea seems to choke your tongue, make it thick and gritty. Why do I order it? Habit, and also the way it looks when you first pour it out. There is something clean about it, happily filling up into the white ceramic. Also makes me feel grown up and mature. It does not make me grown up though, because if tea did that, life would be less complicated. Because how awkward if a four year old makes a cup of China Jasmine tea for herself (what kind of mother lets a four year old play with boiling water? Terrible mothers no doubt) and then the four year old suddenly knows how to discuss and reflect on the human experience. If this is what maturity means, awareness and knowledge of mankind’s experience. Her discussions and would not be appreciated by her peers as she enters Kindergarten in 12 months. They are all talking about who is better at jumping on the logs that are spaced out (not so evenly) in the playground. She rolls her eyes and goes down to their level.

So let us all be thankful that tea does not create maturity. The worst thing that will occur with 4 year olds, boiling water and some smuggled China Jasmine tea is soggy cake and a spilled plastic pink cup, maybe a disgruntled teddy bear. No child is hurt in this scenario, other than his/her pride. Pride to them though is also cut down when they hug a stranger’s leg, mistaking it for their dad’s leg. Mortifying, as the adults around giggle at how cute that was.

The mother with the loud bangles at the grey table is a mother that will be treasured by her twin daughters, now and in the future. She does not dress them in the same clothes, or matching clothes. One is looking like an edgey hippy child and the other, skater girl. They may be six but they know the difference between each other. One sips a Chocolate milkshake, the other a blue milkshake that Apple Juice waitress made earlier. Their mum and her friend (who is wearing an identical jacket to black jacket man earlier), chat about potted plants, and how amazing herbs are. They make dinners taste so much better. Oh and also renovations. Is there an age where this becomes interesting? I also blame those renovation shows.

The owner of the talking shoes still waits for her “someone”. She looks across at the grey table where the twins sip their milkshakes, listening to the renovation conversation. She looks as bored as her necklace is. The newspaper in front of her is invisible, only pretend focus is made. She may as well be staring at the yellow table underneath, the Booth style. Shuffling the paper and turning a page, once again, looking through the paper, words and images meaningless, her elbow slides across. She looks into her handbag, locates keys and her shoes once again silently talk the same talk as she exits. Table, newspaper and renovation talk are reasons to leave the café it seems, whether her someone was coming or not. One of the twins waves to her as she leaves, hippy twin of course.

Chef, has a chef costume on. Well, chef uniform but hey, it’s a costume if you are not a chef. It is debatable that he is a chef, Panini’s and heated up pies being the specialty, and I am pretty sure Apple Juice waitress helps. He looks happy though, Dan is at Chef’s house and has already driven to the Bottle shop, boozy night ahead. Sarah may just be a little easier this time, and Chef may not be sleeping alone tonight.

The “someone”, that the owner of the shoes was waiting for, has arrived. They have passed like ships in the night as they discuss their ship’s movements on the phone. They laugh at the analogy, well he does, as her laugh is not audible through a mobile. I so carelessly assume the laugh was there. He hangs up, his gold chain necklace would have gone so well with her lifeless one. Unsure about the shoes, he is dressed to advertise himself, his watch glinting like the golden chain. He looks safe in himself though. He sits at the same place she did, and he has adopted the newspaper she flicked through earlier with as little purpose as her attempt.

One twin (hippy twin) has gone and the other twin stays with the friend of the mother. A dumbed down conversation occurs, discussing how hard it is to focus on swimming lessons and that skater twin is a better swimmer than hippy twin. Though really, we all know that she can get away with saying this as hippy twin is not there. This would not be mutually agreed on if hippy twin was there. They also apparently only swim at one pool, they are not multi pool adapted. This is such a better discussion than the renovation one with the mums and the girl looks pleased. Renovations suck.

The owner of the shoes enters again, greets the gold chain man, her “someone” and they discuss that their ships have docked into the same harbor.
Such a beautiful analogy that they chuckle at. The newspaper is pushed aside and folded and they confirm they are both busy people. Like me, I am busy. And that they dislike lateness, he shrugs his shoulders and apologizes once again.

Scissor paper rock is played out aggressively between a child licking his icecream and his Dad, the red table welcoming another set of visitors. This game is so much fun. I wonder if another element will be added to this game ever, whether stapler could be added? Or knife? Stapler would beat paper, have a discussion about being stationery items with scissors and be smashed by rock. Stapler could then return to scissors and discuss how much it sucks to be smashed by rock but how they can crumple paper. No, they would be allies, it would not work. The original trio are different personality types with different strengths and weaknesses. I dare not meddle with a classic game passed down through the ages. So lets not even start with knife, too violent. Though scissors are banned on aircraft these days, unless they are those child safe scissors.

Gold chain man, continued to interrupt their business-like meeting by answering his constant ringing phone. His insincere apologies are answered with “its fine” style remarks with a fake laugh from the owner of the shoes. She looks across to the humming fridge, the juice she ordered from this fridge half full and half green. Green juice is going down well it seems. He just finished the call and is back into his waving hands and talking routine. He has lessened the use of hand gestures these days. His presentation about developing nations in grade 10 geography class involved a heavy inclusion of his flying around arms, and was marked down for how distracting they were.

The famous afternoon sun entered without announcement and the peeling image of Greece on the wall lights up. It looks a tad more enticing but not enticing enough to dive into, too flat and flakey. Though the sun was just giving a sneaky preview, as it fades through the overcast afternoon again and leaves the store, no goodbye is necessary. It’s presence, even though brief, was missed straight away. The older lady in the corner with the mauve glasses (her optometrist told her they were hip, and hip they are) pays for her carton of milk, smiles and shuffles out, the door ringing gently behind her. Billy is waiting on the milk.




Monday, August 8, 2011

Trivia

"Hey, my name is Lloyd. Like the car."
"The car?"
"Yeah, my mate called his car Lloyd one time."

Had a few drinks with an old good friend the other evening. Spoke of his experience of accepting an oscar (yes, that sounds wanky to drop that in but screw it), and what was going through his mind while on that stage. One of those moments where you cannot even process what was going on and if this was actually happening. Though my favourite part of what he said is when his mother commented that when you google his name, the second search option says his name and then "gay" and the third option is his name and "boyfriend", and in a disappointing seventh place was his name and "producer".

Warning: Gym story ahead so to those, like myself who dislike people talking about the gym, especially on facebook, go to the next paragraph. I love the amount of old asian people in my gym. They are always smiling and exercising away, talking together. I want to be old and asian so I can talk with them.

Still talking about the gym. No, I am kidding. Horses!!

Just saw snaps of a guy being arrested in the London riots right near my old home in Brixton. I always defended Brixton as a safe place, I did not have much proof for my side of the argument and if you Google Brixton riots, there are a few words about it. But hey Jake and Blake (see my references about my fake pet gay Candadian Geese in the 2006 entries) did not seem to mind living there and they are the peaceful type.

Have you ever gotten your hand stuck inside a tissue box when reaching for one of the last tissues? You feel slightly dumber as a human being.

Off to Trivia night again tonight. This time last week I had no idea what was gonna happen in the last week. I really didnt say much in that statement. I may as well say, last week when I went to the grocery store, I had no idea my Dad was to call me on the following Saturday. Geesh. So really, what I am saying is, something unexpectedly nice has occurred since last week's trivia and it's fun being vague on here.

Kimbra, below. I am seeing her in a few weeks, she had that odd quirkiness that makes her music kinda creepy but good. I like this video, especially the creepy young girl dressed as a 50's housewife.




PS - Elliot


Friday, August 5, 2011

Naps

I was asked today, if I did not grow up being told I was a sinner everyday, who would I be? I sat there being kinda cynical and thought, well I would be someone else, not me. He pushed further with the question and asked me again, "if you were not told countless times that who you were was someone who constantly did the wrong thing, who would you be?"
I didn't know what to say. I instantly felt defensive and unsure. Stumped as such. The concept of not feeling that weight and constriction was so far away from me as a rainbow is, always moving further away if you step closer to it.
I fell into a well of thought, no bucket to bring me back up straight away, but the coolness of what that would be like, deep and dark and endless of what the possibilities of who I could be if I did not grow up that way. But then, I was reminded, I still can be all that, whether I was told that or not.

But also just want to make it clear, growing up was not a painful experience constantly. Hey it is sure, but I had such a loving and warm home. I think it can be easy to either blanket it with one coloured blanket. Multicoloured blankets are a bit more souvenir shop like and complicated. IKEA blankets that are one colour and cheap, are easy. What?

I think I had one of the best first dates of my life tonight.

I fell asleep for a nap today, set my alarm and everything, even though I am anti-nap. But I was sleepy and it was day one of four days off, so I felt the luxury was welcomed. Just like eating cheesecake even though it is pretty disgusting but if you are at wedding reception and there is no option, you will eat it. Well, I do, you may not. So yeah, nap nap nap, then I hear a distant buzzing sound. It is my phone, I look across and its 6pm. What?? I set myself a 20 minute nap at 4pm! And my drinks were at 5:30pm. Shit shit shit... I slid the touch screen to answer, "Hey, shit shit shit". Stressed me out on two levels, I hate the feeling after waking up from a nap as you have no idea what country or time zone or dimension you are in. It may be that you are 11 again and its time to wake up for school, or you may be 55 and thought you were dreaming of when you were 27 and now you are back awake again and its mexico outside and slightly chilly. The second reason it stressed me out is that I am an on time person. This situation happened to be a date also, and the good old saying "First impressions... something or other" may could well have applied. Though thankfully, I dont think it did and it will be a story. For whatever reason, like those moments, they are stories of your life. That will be brought up, at a dinner or drinks with mates at age 37 where you go, "So I accidentally stood up a date when I napped a tad too long cause iPhone technology sucked back in 2011, and I set my alarm for 4:30am, not pm". And my mate Barry (cause Barry is a brilliant Australian name and I aim to find a friend who has this name) will go, "Oh Lloyd, thats a funny story, it made me chuckle and relate to a time I had a nap and left the fridge running with a child inside". I didnt say anything about whether Barry was sane or insane.

I like to ride my bike, and I shall express this thought, soon.





Location:Lansdowne St,East Melbourne,Australia

Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Engadine


I walked along the slopey and rocky footpath past my old church last week, used to love doing this as a kid. Now I have old clark leather shoes on and I have a beard. Not a kid.

Its ok, I am alive. I was writing and then stopped and then wrote and then stopped.

I wrote this though:

Writing this while in my brother's old bedroom in our old family home. It has rained all week, which has been great. Always loved my home growing up when it rained, as the metal roof made the rain louder and if you were cuddled up in bed it was the most comforting sound. But if it was winter, you have to lie really still and not slide your feet across to other part of the bed as it would be cold and who wants to have to go through the experience more than once of warming up the bed.
Thunder just rolled down the street and a dog barked. More rain. The splash sound as cars drive past the top of the street. And this bed gets more and more comfy.
My nephew came in before, he walks but cannot walk on a bed yet, way too unstable. You throw him up high and he giggles a lot and has learnt the word "more" much to his advantage. He is just stoked at that. I wish my plant said "more" when it needed water. Look further down the page to read about the plant, as I have placed this in as a warning.

Then I got back from Sydney and I wrote this:

My cousin told me this blog was emotional vomit. I actually had no issue with her saying this, as perceptions really do fascinate me. This really could be seen as emotional vomit. I just blurt out whatever comes into my head and it is usually emotive. Vomit also comes out unexpectedly, so in a beautiful harmony, vomit and emotion mix together, with chunks of carrot and sometimes corn.

I got home from Sydney after a fairly uneventful trip other than seeing loved ones (yep that part was eventful), and got texts from friends all saying welcome home. Welcome home. Yeah I would say it is home now, it has been 6 months today since I flew here and wheeled my suitcase next to the bluestone gutters that are so familiar in Melbourrne. And I do not regret it at all, I love it.

I bought a plant. It has green leaves that then turn into red leaves at the top of the plant. I walked into a florist when I saw it in the window, with a lovely rafia bow (Gee, I have rafia and a bow in my house. This reminds me of my mum in the 90's making rafia hats at christian camp). I walked in and after the quick smile and chat that its cold outside, asked her what plant in here will survive in an apartment. She pointed to the red one and destiny was mine. An old man came out the front of the shop and wrapped it up in brown paper(must be his duty, maybe his only one), I do not know why but it protected Elliot from the cold. Elliot is the plant's name, and he does not have a star sign.

I love that I do not lose my romantic bone, or romantic heart for that matter. I can keep hurting myself and yet I still have that hope. It also projects back on the love I have felt and also given and there is a memorial service to that past sometimes. Some mix tape is played and a sad song or a happy song is there, but there are so many songs yet to be written that will remind me of a future love and other songs that have been written that have simply not been discovered by me, that will be introduced by someone who will make me smile.

Have not seen Mr Fox for a while. Some say he may have been ousted as Mr Fox and is now just Fox, over in St Kilda. Sucks hey.
I have noticed that Tram Drivers, wave to each other. Just as in Sydney, Bus drives wave to each other. It makes me wonder if the entire bus company or train company of drivers know each other or do they do it as some social formality. "You drive a Tram too and are going past me, hello!!" And the wave returns to them "Gday mate".

I saw this video and the words are haunting, he is such a great artist and it just gets topped off when Kimbra turns up in the video. She rocks.

Monday, July 11, 2011

Coffin

Something I value about jobs is finding the really cool aspects and then sit outside of yourself and smile. Painting a base of a wall in one of the galleries for King Tut and having a 3500 year old golden coffin sitting there near me. Noone else is inside the galleries and it is late at night. My music playing from another of the rooms, educating the artifacts on music from 2011. Something about it, was just simply, simple.

I had a dinner party last night. Vegetarian style, and I so reminded myself of my mother. I do not know how that happened, but just how she loved to cook and host, I like doing the same. Though not the same kinds of food, my own twist. I like cooking but do not like those cooking shows and reality comps like Masterchef. It makes it so common and addictive and generic. Just like when you fight with window blinds and you pull the rope cord and the stupid thing does not catch or it lopsides and not straight across. And you end up communicating way too heavily with strips of metal and rope as to why it is not cooperating with your desire for less or more light.

Had my mate Dave here the past few days and he inspired me to go back to the ACMI (Some letters representing the museum of the moving image I think) and so I took another friend Bernard and his sister there. There is this pretty cool (yes Dave, pretty cool) wheel that moves around and around and then the lights start flashing and it comes to life. This is kind of stupid to explain in writing as I bet you have no idea what I am saying.. youtubing now... There, just watch.



And so, was showing them and then they walked out half way. Rude. Only to discover his sister is epileptic. Oh. So just check beforehand next time. Epileptic warnings are there for a reason.

Off to Sydney in a few days. My thoughts currently are mainly drained at trying to organise to hang with people. It is not an easy task. Funny how visits to see friends/family is not a holiday. Though hey, if my chicken Denise was still alive, I would be guaranteed to be chilled. Maybe I will find her grave. Just as much talking would go on, pre or post her death. RIP once again Denise.

I found this photo on my camera, taken the day I was about to move to Melbourne. I put it as my facebook profile. Because I was not smiling people told me it was a bad photo. Does a photo of a face have to be smiling to be a good one? I just liked the rawness, but trying not to be up myself with it. We attempt this all the time and fail yeah?